Week Two Post Double Mastectomy

 It felt weird when they first took out the bandages. I didn’t feel as secure and really didn’t want to move. They also remove the surgical glue, turns out I’m allergic to it. Probably due to my eczema, it was just really itchy but manageable. It was also weird when they took out the drains how they just put a bandaid on top. Crazy how your body can just close up a hole like that. Time went on and I feel more comfortable with more energy. The thing that sucked this second week was literally the day after I got my drains removed, I started on my period. I lost so much blood these past 2 weeks 😭. But my heart is full, my friends and clients surprised me with gifts and a couple of my coworkers showered me with food. It was must needed. I cried when I first saw the bandages off. But now the more I look at them, the more accepting I am to them and they don’t bother me anymore. All the emotions were mainly from the buildup before the surgery. I had more time then to evaluate and grieve what was going to happen. And now that it happened, I’m more accepting and okay with the situation. I lost feeling in the bottom part of my breast but I still have feeling on the top. They said it was because my breast are small they didn’t have to scoop all the nerves out. For some people, their breast tissues goes all the way up to their collar bones! So yay for small boobies! Haha.

On April April 22, I started my first expansion. I have the expanders above the muscle. There’s a metal port where they insert the needle in. They gave me a card for it whenever I would have to go through a metal detector. Didn’t realized I had it, I guess I was too high when they gave it to me in the recovery room. But yeah, went in for my appointment and they had this magnetic stud finder. Then poke poke, 30cc of saline added in on each side. Normally they add 50cc each time but they wanted to start off slow and see how I react. And it was fine. I only felt the needle going in, other than that it was totally fine. It only felt slightly tight but I would have to think about it. But all I do is think all day so I noticed it lol.

Overall, my recovery is surprisingly going really well. I think I’m really lucky. And I finally got the okay to walk 10-15mins a day. I think the anesthesia is starting to fade away. I’m very sensitive and get motion sickness previously. So going up and down the stairs, car rides makes me dizzy that I’d feel nauseous. I definitely cannot do long car rides at the moment. Did one already, barely made it out alive. I can lift both of my arms up above my head. The left side is a little bit of a struggle but it still goes up so that’s good thing. Certain movements I can’t do, like mixing things. I did my mother in laws root touch up to see where I’m at. I had my wonderful husband as my assistant. He had to pour and mix everything for me. And I had her reaaaally low so that wasn’t a problem. Made me realize I have to take 6 weeks off work. Especially since my chair at work is higher and I can’t do any heavy lifting till then anyways. I’m actually nervous going back to work, I’m going to be so weak. Because the lame part is not being able to do anything that makes my heart race or  lift anything more than 5lbs, which is almost everything. Like I can’t pour myself water since we use a brita, our plates are pretty solid so can only carry it when it’s empty, so really I always need someone around me.

Mentally I’m more stable. Been connecting with other “breasties” and sharing our experiences together which is really really helpful. Everyone’s experiences is so unique to their own and it’s nice to learn about them. My sister been hanging out with me a lot and I have people checking up on me. Really helps me with my boredom. It’s very boring, feels like shelter in place again. As long as I stay out of my head, I’m fine. The problem of being bored is that I’m tired but restless at the same time. I don’t do much, so I have nothing to make me tired, but I’m tired of doing nothing. It’s a catch 22. Never watch the movie. Probably should now.