My Double Mastectomy

 It felt weird when they first took out the bandages. I didn’t feel as secure and really didn’t want to move. They also remove the surgical glue, turns out I’m allergic to it. Probably due to my eczema, it was just really itchy but manageable. It was also weird when they took out the drains how they just put a bandaid on top. Crazy how your body can just close up a hole like that. Time went on and I feel more comfortable with more energy. The thing that sucked this second week was literally the day after I got my drains removed, I started on my period. I lost so much blood these past 2 weeks 😭. But my heart is full, my friends and clients surprised me with gifts and a couple of my coworkers showered me with food. It was must needed. I cried when I first saw the bandages off. But now the more I look at them, the more accepting I am to them and they don’t bother me anymore. All the emotions were mainly from the buildup before the surgery. I had more time then to evaluate and grieve ...

Friday April 15 at 4pm, I finally got my drains out! Woohoo! I had four drains attached to me, two on each side and they were crazy annoying. I called them my little grenades. We had to dump it every 4hrs, measure and record it on a spreadsheet. My husband had the honors on this task. We’re both squeamish with blood. Thinking about it now makes me a little light headed…The physician assistant, who I’ll be seeing the next few weeks, was very helpful and comfortable to be around. We learned that the surgeon put in 100cc instead of 70cc of saline. Each week the PA will add 50cc of saline until I’m satisfied. Then I’ll have my next surgery 3 months after the last injection. But today she just pulled out my drains with ease and took the bandages out. They also removed the surgical glue that were on top of my stitches and realized I’m allergic to it, but thats probably due from my eczema. And I told her that someone safety-pinned my drains to my skin instead of my surgical bra. That wasn...

 Friday April 8, 2022 I started double mastectomy with reconstruction. My day started at 3:15am. I was sent a bottle of electrolytes to drink 2hrs before my check in time at 5:15. It took around 2hrs for set up and didn’t start heading to the surgery room till 7:30am. It was a dual surgery. First, my breast surgeon goes in and removes all my breast tissues. Then he switches out with my plastic surgeon. She went in and put tissue expanders and filled them with 70cc of saline in me. The surgery lasted about 5hrs. I don’t remember when or how long I was in the recovery room. While in the recovery room, I found out I’m very sensitive to medication. I stopped breathing a couple times while I was under. I heard it’s common so they have to just wake me up and keep adjusting. Even in the recovery room, my eyes were shaking and I remembered every time I felt tired, my heart rate would be super low. So the monitor would make a beeping noise and a nurse would run in. This happened maybe 3x? A...

Summer 2019, I found a lump in my right breast. I had eczema next to it and so happened to be laying on my side, scratching at the the right spot in the right time when I discovered it. It was really small back then. But my mom is a cancer survivor so my natural reaction was to see my gynecologist. When I went in, she just felt it and said because “I’m so young”,  she assumes it was just a cyst. She told me it still moves around between her fingers so it should be fine but I should still keep an eye out for any changes. 2020 came around, and covid shelter in place started. As time went on that year, I noticed it was slowly growing and I was starting to be in pain. It hurts more when I was on my period which I found it later was normal. But I kept telling to myself, “well it’s just a cyst. And it’s just on the side near my arm where I easily keep hitting it. That’s why it hurts. Don’t worry about it.” Then as more time went on, it got even more annoying. And at the time, I was stayi...